


Narnia Edition

by GrumpkinVicky



Series: Millicent Avoids a War The Multiverse [4]
Category: Chronicles of Narnia - C. S. Lewis, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Character Death, Dark Comedy, Fluff and Crack, Giants, Hags, Mandrakes, Minor Character Death, Multi, Not Canon Compliant, Pocket Dimension, Sex Positive, The Deathly Hallows
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 18:09:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21275492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrumpkinVicky/pseuds/GrumpkinVicky
Summary: Millicent arrives in a Narnia ruled over by the Queen of Narnia, this should be a fine world to live in.





	Narnia Edition

**Author's Note:**

> Please if you want any of this to even remotely make sense please read Millicent Avoids a War. All the others in the series are different endings to that story.

When they had first arrived in Narnia well, Neville had lasted all of a week before running off with the Dryads. Remus had disappeared shortly after finding a pack of talking wolves, who had been on the cusp of joining the secret police for the Queen of Narnia who had become more and more paranoid according to the talking animals. Millicent, however, had been quite happy to find someone who had been pro Hags.

She had been taken under the wing of a small coven who were kept in fresh meat by the Queen, and whilst perhaps the meat wasn’t of the highest quality, it had nicely supplemented the Mandrakes Millicent was trying to cultivate in the snowy forests. Millicent had been less keen when the Queen had requested that the dark creatures in the land started to pay tributes. Even less when she had realised after bumping into Remus who suddenly looked much older, which he assured her happened after sixty years, it still hadn’t stopped being Winter.

Her Hagish friends, who had started to also look older now that she was paying attention, had informed her that Narnia hadn’t always been winter, that before the Queen had become paranoid about the Sons of Adam and Daughters of Eve, Father Christmas had visited which heralded Spring. They had then had to explain who Father Christmas was. Also who the Sons of Adam and Daughters of Eve were. 

She had gone to hunt down Neville shortly after, only to find that he had died years earlier. Remus had also succumbed to the same illness called old age, much to her disgust. So she had left the relative good company of a different cycle of Hags after the first lot had seemingly also given in to age and poor diet, to find advice on the best way to cultivate her Mandrakes so they wouldn’t sulk and provide an inferior meal in the cold dark of Winter.

The Dryad’s had seemed like a good place to start, being that she knew where they were from trying to track down Neville, even if he had been rude enough to croak it. They had been less keen to speak to her, claiming that she worked for the enemy. Not wishing to prove them correct, she had kept her temper, and waited them out until finally, it had been a faun who had cracked, giving into her not insignificant Hagish wiles. Mr Tumnus had pointed her in the direction of the Beavers, who were rumoured to be true believers in a lion named Aslan.

Millicent had been less keen to tramp across the country, looking for Beavers in case they had more of an idea about how to reach a lion so that she could have decent tasting Mandrakes. So she instead went to see the Queen, much to the horror of her fellow Hags. 

The Queen had been less than pleased when Millicent had appeared at her castle, demanding to know why she wasn’t allowing some barmy old man to make it Spring.

“How dare you address her Highness like that Hag!” Well, the dwarf hadn’t managed to say anything more before being shoved into Millicent’s bag.

“Millicent the Hag of Other World, do I not give you food, do I not let you live in my land without harm?” The Queen asked generously.

“Dwarves aren’t children, Janice Queen of Narnia.” Millicent replied sternly.

“You may address me as Queen Jadis.” There had been a hesitation before the Queen had replied.

“That’s as good as maybe Queen Jaydis, but still doesn’t address my question, you provide dwarves, not children, dwarves do not taste the same, they don’t have the same life as a child does, it’s like stale bread instead of the finest steak. Hardly comparable. My Mandrakes do not enjoy the cold, you will let the barmy old man in so I can grow fine tasting feasts. You will stop pretending to “gift us” with the paltry offerings.” The Queen watched as Millicent was wandering around the room picking up small statues and throwing them with little care into her bag.

“Millicent the Hag of Other World, do you know who I am, I am the Queen Jadis of all that the eye can see, a Daughter of Eve, one who has authority over this place.” Millicent snorted.

“You know, you are about as Daughter of Eve as I am.” There was a moment where the Queen clenched her wand, pointing it at Millicent who shrugged. “I have no care about what you tell people, although it’s a bit much for someone as pro-Dark as you, not to embrace your own uniqueness. Still doesn’t solve my issue though does it.” 

“Begone, Millicent the Hag of Other World before I strike you down.” Millicent let out a deep sigh.

“Well, so much for being pro-Hag. I shall see you on the other side, Jamis.” The screams of anger echoed the valley long after Millicent had departed with several wolves on her tail, as she set off to find the Beavers after all.

The Beavers appreciated the warmth of good wolf pelts, although had turned their noses up at the meat, much preferring Mr Beavers efforts from fishing. Mr Tumnus had arrived with four children, and then asked Millicent if she would kindly not eat the Sons and Daughters, with the Beavers also politely suggesting that they would be able to help her grow Mandrakes if they remained alive, which would be far better in the long term. Millicent accepted it, not particularly well, but she had accepted the wisdom behind the words it had helped that Mr Tumnus had volunteered to distract her as often as she needed, and so taught the Sons and Daughters important lessons in adulthood.

The Beavers had been concerned that the evil Queen would hunt them down, but there had been little evidence of this until one morning when all but Millicent and the Sons and Daughters had become frightened at the sound of sleigh bells. Millicent offered a safe place to hide whilst she investigated, claiming that she would struggle the least should it be Queen Jeva. 

Father Christmas had been concerned when it was only the Hag who appeared, and more so when she had refused to speak to him until he offered her a present, she, in turn, promised that she would provide the presents to the others after he had left, as she treated her role of protector most seriously.

They had a long conversation about the merits of bags over a feast fit for a Hag, and how he would very much prefer it if she didn’t push him in her bag and steal his bag as well, and that her bag was more than enough. He’d reminded her faintly of her Guardian from before she had been a Hag, as he asked exactly what she would do with two bags.

“Millicent the Hag of Other World, do you believe you would truly be able to find anything should you follow through with what you are plotting?” Millicent had shrugged.

“Sometimes it’s not about what will happen, as much as what might happen. I would be a poor Hag if I didn’t consider my options, and Father Christmas, if I were to steal you as well, would that not gift me with two bags, my own superior bag, and yours which has the power of providing the perfect gift for any occasion? I would never be embarrassed again turning up to see a friend or an enemy. I would rule supreme.” 

They had come to a compromise, after she had polished off some of the finest dishes she had tasted since arriving in Narnia. Father Christmas provided her with a lesser quality bag, one that would only give a mid-tier present, and she had let him leave without using her powers on him. Still, he hadn’t turned his back on her after he’d lain out the presents with labels for her cargo.

She’d almost forgotten to remove them from her bag once he’d left. Well by almost she had, she’d stuffed the presents in her bag, and the new mini present bag, and then had returned back to her home, the snow finally beginning to melt. In the end, it had taken another few years before an emissary from Aslan appeared to ask where the Sons and Daughters had disappeared to. The Queen had only approached Millicent once, leaving her numerous statues for her flourishing Mandrake Grove, before finally leaving in a fit of pique.

“Millicent the Hag of Other World, Aslan the Rightful King of Narnia has requested the presence of the Sons of Adam and Daughters of Eve. It is believed that they were last seen in your presence, and it is hoped that Millicent the Hag of Other World has not turned them over to the White Witch.” It was a rather timid looking rabbit who had approached her, after hiding in her flourishing gardens for a week whilst she had been weeding her supply of Mandrakes.

“Who - oh, yes, perhaps.” She’s wracked her brain to remember the last time she’d seen the four children, before faintly blushing. “Well, I will escort them to Aslan the supposed Rightful King of Narnia, although at this point I’m half expecting someone else to come knocking at the door as the Honorable Emperor of Narnia and the Six Seas…” she half grumbled as the talking rabbit kept its distance.

She wasn’t given the warmest welcome as she’d walked into the Lion’s lair. Whilst she, unlike the other Hags, was a young Hag and looked more alike to the Nymphs and Dryads than to those who she truly considered kin, to Aslan’s camp she was treated as if the White Witch herself, complete with drawn weapons, hiding of the young and lots of glaring.

“Peace, peace, she comes in peace.” A Centaur with a deadly looking spear escorted her up to the sumptuous tent where the largest and only Lion she’d ever seen was waiting for her.

“Millicent the Hag of Other World, welcome.” She had to be reminded to release the four children, two Beavers and one Faun after Aslan had stared at her for a good length of time. She admitted that instead of releasing them straight away, she had forgotten, a case of out of sight out of mind, and had returned back to her home, where she had spent more than a few years happily pottering. Aslan had been less than pleased.

The White Witch also made an appearance with the arrival of a dwarf, who had appeared looking more nervous to see Millicent than the Lion, claiming that the White Witch was there to parlay as to the future of Narnia. The parlay failed as soon as she had attempted to attack the bored-looking Millicent who was by herself in the middle of the field, not even the four children choosing to keep her company. Although Mr Tumnus did spend some time with her, under the darkness of night, after being warned away by other fauns.

“You! You dare, you who came to this world and brought with you filth and corruption. I demand that she is turned over to my justice!” Millicent had merely waved at the incandescent rage of the Witch whilst some around wondered not too quietly as to what the harm would be. When Aslan failed to hand over the bored-looking Hag, the White Witch had gone to attack her once again with her wand, only managing to create more little statues around her, which were cured after the Witch was chased away promising death to all.

Millicent finally remembered before the night of the proposed battle, of the gifts that the fat old man who had vaguely reminded her of Dumbledore had given for those she had been storing. The gifts were received with some confusion, Edmund’s compass that span round and round until he moved away from his siblings to then point in their direction had been cooed over. Lucy’s elixir was met with cheer, as was the horn for Susan, and Peter had looked pleased at the weapons they each received. 

The battle itself had been fairly bloody which Millicent had predicted during a session with the faun who had become quite attached to the Hag after she’d dragged several garden ornaments out of her bag, which Aslan turned back into the creatures they had originally been. It had done little however to ingratiate her with the others, as several pointed out she had them in there for weeks before remembering. 

The White Witch had been torn between attacking the Lion, the children but it had been Millicent who had particularly upset her and drawn her attention, even as her armies that were lacking some of the dark creatures she had relied on. The Hags had all refused to get involved after Millicent had met up with a couple to complain yet again about how Queen Jilly still thought that dwarves were a suitable substitution to children. A few of the dark giants had left with Millicent’s home address, and some Mandrake pie recipes, after she’d snuck out without letting Mr Tumnus know, to scratch a giant-sized itch.

Still, there was plenty of death, and she had done a fine job at the end of clearing up, Queen Joan was no more, having expended a great deal of energy at attempting to curse the Hag who had defied her so insistently. She had been last seen with Millicent, who had assured them all that they would never have to see her ever again. They assumed that she referred to the White Witch, although Millicent also shortly disappeared after the battle. She had chosen to return to her home, without Mr Tumnus, who had looked slightly bereft by her leaving in the middle of the night without saying goodbye.

And so Millicent lived quite happily, in her home in the deepest and darkest of woods, left well alone by all those who were not the same. She missed the leaving of the now Kings and Queens, she’d missed several failed invasions, and had declined the trip of a lifetime to travel to the edge of the world seven times, including an invitation from Aslan himself who had offered to take her back to Other World.

Still she had travelled with a Jill Pole and a relative of the children from before, travelled with them and with a fine example of Marsh-wiggle named Puddleglum, who had many fine attributes indeed. She’d had a grand time, exchanging recipes with the Giants, and leaving them a batch of her finest Mandrakes that they greatly appreciated. And whilst the Lady they had met had been a little standoffish with Millicent, the male figure had been more receptive. Much more receptive. The Lady had turned into a snake shortly after discovering Millicent, the Knight and the Marsh-Wiggle in carnal relations, spitting literal poison at the Hag whilst the two males were trying to redress. 

Millicent had been highly upset by the interruption, having finally convinced the two children to spend the night in another part of the cave system so that they wouldn’t be interrupted, and so whilst the male who introduced himself to a baffled looking Puddleglum as Rillian, was busy trying to find his sword, the snake had vanished.

It took slightly longer to return back to Cair Paravel than it had to travel to Harfang, Millicent had insisted in scratching several itches with the Giants, and hadn’t hung around long when they had concluded their travels, although she had left directions to her home with both of her male adult companions with a saucy wink. She had been a little surprised when Rillian had sent his formerly elderly relative to speak to her about how she would feel about becoming a Royal Consort. She had declined, though Caspian had spent a long time with her trying to convince her to visit the seat of the crown in Narnia. 

There had been little surprise when Millicent had been called out of her slumbering existence after the first portents had been born. She had objected to the attack on her forests, and had been an outright critic of those claiming to be Aslan. It had come as more of a surprise when Aslan, the true Aslan had approached the Hag, who had looked outraged at the way forces were encroaching on her now vast territory. 

“Milly!” She had vaguely recognised the voice, then a lower growly “Millicent.” Had her smiling, just a little. 

“Remus, long time no see, and Neville, fancy seeing you here.” The wolf looked as young as the day they had arrived in Narnia, and Neville as old as the last time she had seen him, a mature healthy male still wrapped around the Dryads.

“Remus said you would make it, but the others thought that maybe you wouldn’t…” There was a faint forlorn note to Neville’s voice, and looking around the place Aslan had called the beginning of everything, she saw faces of others who also looked as if they had doubted it.

“Well, after I was promised a nice forest how could I resist?” There was a faint smirk on the wolf’s face as she spoke, and she knew that whilst it wasn’t the greatest of places to be a Hag, it wasn’t completely - oh giants!


End file.
